Steve Heller lives in the Hudson Valley off Route 28, and creates sculpture and furniture from some unlikely materials, namely pieces of old cars and wonderfully twisted wood. I learned about Heller from the book Weird New York, which lists some of the various oddities in New York State and is all kinds of awesome, and is also where I learned about Rosemary's Texas Taco in Patterson.
Anyway, Steve Heller created the pieces seen here. The first one is a side table made from a maple burl. A burl is one of those lumpy things that occur on trees sometimes due to the wood grain growing irregularly (according to Wikipedia). Instead of avoiding these growths, Heller uses them to create furniture like this, which reminds people that trees are living things with bumps and irregularities like people, not simply smooth material with which to build. A table like this serves as a reminder that it was once alive.
He also makes large scale metal sculpture like this metal bird out of scrap. This one is called the Ostrichosaurus, and they seem to stand around his property and offer their input on things. These are purely aesthetic, but still retain the general theme of Heller's work, which is the reuse of items that would otherwise be considered unusable or undesirable.
The other material Heller uses are pieces of vintage cars, creating kitschy but functional home products. The front end of a 1957 Cadillac, for example, becomes a bar with a full set of shelving in the back for storage. The head- and taillights of a 1938 Packard become a "rocket lamp," and the hood of another car (whose identity I couldn't find on the site) becomes the lid of a red cedar chest. I would guess that things like this aren't for everyone, given their bulk and their general loudness, but they're pretty cool novelty pieces. His wooden furniture, which ranges from full-sized dining room tables to small mirrors, are a little more accessible and likely work better in a wider range of homes.
I have not been up to see Heller's place in person, although I'd like to and it would be fairly easy for me to drive up there. If I ever go, I'll be sure to take pictures.
It's that time again--the shortest day of the year (in the Northern Hemisphere, at least, which is where I live), and time to appreciate the darkness and the coming light.
So to celebrate, here's a watercolor of me and some bony crows of winter enjoying the cold. I like the winter. I like all seasons, in fact, and I think it's kind of weird when people say they don't like a certain season. First of all, disliking a season seems pointless, because there's nothing you can do about it (except contribute to the greenhouse effect, I guess). Then there's the fact that I find the change of seasons refreshing, and I think I would get really bored if there were only one or two seasons. Four is a nice amount. Just when you're getting tired of one, it changes. When you're tired of the heat, summer's over and it's autumn. When you're tired of the cold, it's spring. And when you're tired of the changeable weather, it becomes either consistently hot or consistently cold. Right now it's cold and dark, and you can see all the lights for miles thanks to the relative clarity of cold air. And there are cookies.
Also just for fun here's a picture of Zooey Deschanel, (whose name I never know to pronounce "Zoh-ee" or "Zu-ee"), in all her horrifying glory. Seriously, lady creeps the shit out of me. I think it's her enormous, icy, soulless eyes and the fact that in every photo I see of her, she seems to be saying, "Boop!" while thinking about the inevitable invasion by her alien compatriots.
Plus I hate it when actors only play one type of role. I just want to see her play like a crack dealer or a ruthless assassin. Just once. Please?
It was apparently a time for re-doing 
things. Sometimes spending some time apart from a piece of work allows you to see more clearly the problem areas, and then you can go back in and make the necessary adjustments. First up was Caligula Rape Face and his non PC title. Which is still the same, mind you. The original image, which I've uploaded here, was completed some time last summer (I think), and I was only partially pleased with it. But after spending so much time together, I couldn't think critically about it. So recently I gave him some major reconstructive surgery and I'm liking how he turned out. I fixed the face to better resemble the person it's based on, added detail to the face and hand, made the hair fluffier and added a yellow color, and made the body stand out more by adding white and blue glazes to the preexisting pink ones. I also fancied up his cross necklace a bit, and changed the bird skull into a rabbit skull. And of course I added MOAR glitter and some cute little pink heart sequins to the bottom. And yes, I'm still using Martha. I'm really happy with the face now, and the original looks totally crappy by comparison. This is also the first oil painting I've (re)completed in a while, which is a nice feeling. The next image isn't so much a re-do as a different version of a sketch. The original Sepsis, Sugarplums and Blood is a simple pencil sketch from my sketchbook (there's my curly little handwriting at the bottom), and was drawn after a weird night with some friends. I later developed it into a water media piece, using watercolor, ink, watercolor pencil and gouache on Arches paper. I didn't originally intend for them to have neon hair like that, but I like how it turned out. Also, I once did have purple hair like that. What I like about the two of these when seen side by side is the facial expressions, which are all different, but equally likeable. Each picture communicates a distinct mood, with the pencil sketch being somewhat sadder and more nihilistic (which was kind of how I was feeling after said night with friends), and the water media one is happier. I also thought the fly on the orange-haired one was a nice addition. That was Beast Boy's idea.
The following was taken from a journal entry, also called "I Hate Ponies," I posted to my deviantART account in a fit of gleeful rage. I was sifting through the front few pages of the site, which is a feat in itself, and getting more and more grossed out by the My Little Pony phenomenon. There's all kinds of creepy pny-themed shit out there. Most of it is fairly innocuous (though still weird and gag-inducing), showing happy, pastel-colored ponies doing anthropomorphic pony things. Fanart is lame, but whatever. Then I came across this image.
Seriously. What the fuck is this. It was created by this fucking creepy weirdo, who might have some artistic talent if they weren't so icky. I mean seriously. What the fuck. And yeah, I shamelessly ripped it off because whoever creates fucked-up pink pony girls deserves it.
It prompted me to write the following:
Okay, so what the hell is the appeal of the newest My Little Ponies series?
On the surface, I get it. It's got bright colors and some trippy animation that appeals to small children and stoned adults. Fine. That's great. When I was little, I fucking loved My Little Ponies. I had like 8,000 plastic ponies in various sugary colors that lived on my dresser, and they all had distinct names and personalities and had all sorts of adventures. I also did not watch the original animated series, which allowed me a certain freedom in their character conception. So yeah, I get it. Rainbow ponies are awesome. When you're six.
I also understand, to a certain extent, why people like to make art referencing their favorite cartoon characters. I'm not much into creating outright fan art (because, you know, I have my own ideas), but I get it that people are inspired by media that appeals to them. But I don't understand the fascination that compels people to dedicate SO much time to creating pony art. Like what the ponies would look like if they were humans (Spoiler alert! They have huge tits!) What REALLY creeps me out though are the images of sexy ponies, where little, brightly colored horses are put into sexual positions and giving the "come hither" look. That's fucking creepy. They're fucking ponies. Ponies. That's sick, bro(ny).
Also? To be perfectly honest? The cartoon show is crap. It's not funny, it's not well written, it's not anything but a bunch of anthropomorphized ponies with shrill voices delivering heavy-handed (hoofed?) life lessons. I got about four minutes into one episode and I was like, "That's enough of that." And this is coming from someone who waxes philosophical about 12 Oz. Mouse. Now, I understand that everyone likes different things, and that's what makes us a beautiful rainbow of humanity and all that shit, but I just don't understand why this franchise has such a dedicated and frankly downright creepy following. I think it's creepy when people create sexual-fantasy-esque images of, say, anime characters, but at least those are humans, or at least humanoids. That makes sense to me. Why the fuck are you drawing Moonlight Buttermoose or whatever the fuck laid out on a bed with her ass in the air? What the fuck is wrong with you?
For the record, and despite the title of this entry, I don't actually hate ponies. Not real ponies, anyway. I spent a summer at a farm camp when I was seven or eight in the company of a 45-year-old pony (if you don't know, that's REALLY OLD in pony years) named Checkers. Checkers was pretty awesome. He was all gray in the face and ambled around and munched on things and was very friendly towards everyone. I'm only sorry that Checkers' memory is being tainted by candy-colored zoophiles. Fuck you guys.
I really like Kidrobot. They are, I know, a complete waste of money in reality, and do nothing but add to the clutter on my top shelf. But I love them. I love that they send me free keychains with my order and I love the anticipation of a blind box purchase.
So here are some of the do-it-yourself models they offer. The one on the left is a Rooz model, and is some kind of mystical forest spirit. The one on the right is a Trikky model, and is an intergalactic graffiti artist. They go very nicely together, and I like to think they have many adventures. I determined their personae by the accessories they came with--a stick (Rooz, seen here), and a spray paint can mounted on a stick (Trikky, not shown because it gets in the way of its face).
Everything done with markers, Munnyworld, Prismacolor, and Sakura Microns. Figures are vinyl.
